Mothers are the epitome of comfort. They’re our security and our refuge. They can be annoying as heck but we love them regardless. Just how Pizza comes with different toppings, every family in India comes with different types of mothers that make our lives better in its own way.
The keep it Spotless
Yep! That’s how they want everything to look. Spotless. This type of mothers are clean freaks. They hate dirt but they love it at the same time because they’ll take any excuse just to clean. These mothers would even wash their whole house down after a guest leaves. Removing every trace of their visit. You can’t never leave dishes on the sink or allow entry of pollution into your house. And if they do so, these mothers will turn the house upside down, become a lady Hitler and dictate the whole family to clean.
These are the new generation mothers and a very few from the older generations. These mothers are your best friend. You can’t ever hide anything from them. They’re your human diary. You know you can go up to them with anything…. your sex life to your relationships or your bad grades to gossips about your least favourite relatives. They will always be by your side to defend you and listen to you. Every friend that you have wants your mother to adopt them. And you are always allowed sleepovers and late nights. The coolest, right??
No late nights, no back talks, no secrets, no gossips and definitely no sex before marriage or any conversations about it after! These mothers are so strict you don’t even bother asking them anything. They are your dad’s team. Anything you spill in front of them goes to your father for the final thoughts. They will ground you and then complain about you being inside all the time. They’ll take away your phone and complain about you making a mess in the house and our favourite, they’ll want you to socialize with your relatives but ask you to quickly go inside your room just when you finally get comfortable socializing. They love you and they annoy you but you won’t ever tolerate someone else calling them out for not being too “cool”.
There is no messing with these mothers. This type of mother is the reason why most of us are savages too. They are strict and cool at the same time. They’ll roast you in every public event but will roast anyone who dares to put you down. These mothers have sarcastic comebacks ready at the tip of their tongue. You can never get a straight answer from them- “mother, can I get a glass of water?” “yes, why not, after all, I birthed you to become your slave”, “mother, can I wear this short dress?” “sure, wear it with the other half”, and so on! You may get pissed but only when you grow up do you realize you grew up to be just as sarcastic and savage as your mother!
If this type of mother had a starter pack, it would be a stick, a sandal and the rolling pin. They love household marshal art. They have only one reflex and that is, to hit you. No matter who commits the crime, her kids are sure to bear the slaps. You practically grow up athletic because you’re always running away from her sandal throws and ear pinches. They have different slaps for every occasion the intensity is directly proportionate to the intensity of the crime you committed. This crime isn’t even a crime. It can be as simple as you making an oblong roti. The more it looks like a map, the harder the slaps you get!
The Busy Bee
The independent woman! This type of mother is loving as any other type but has very little time to show her love. She’s a working lady with major work responsibility. She’s the boss of the house. She isn’t too involved in your life but she makes sure you experience all the fun growing up. She makes sure you shop well, eat in the best of restaurants and take yearly family trips. You have a pleasant relationship with her. You both respect each other’s space and sometimes bond over mutual feelings. You don’t need her permission for anything because she isn’t around much so you have a pretty carefree life growing up.
The one who will tolerate anything. Most of these mothers who belong to this type, practice yoga or have no trigger button in them. They are sweet. Maybe even sweeter than honey. The whole world can come crashing down but they somehow would still manage to be positive. These mothers sometimes get on our nerves too especially when they tolerate all the wrong things. They are nice to the relatives who don’t care. They are nice to the elders who don’t respect back. Worst of all they even have nice things to say about your worst enemies! You somewhat look up to them as an idol of kindness but you still have numerous arguments because she is just too nice!
The Mission Impossible
Pleasing this type of mother is a mission impossible ! Did you clean the house? It’s still dirty. You got 99%? Sharma Ji’s daughter got 99.5%, you need to work harder. You make round roti’s? Nope, the diameter doesn’t divide to two equal radius . They will ask you to do the chores but the chores will end up coming slamming at your face with criticism. These mothers are perfectionists. You know you have done a job well when they have that partial smile on their face or a word of “hm, good”. You feel as if you’ve conquered the world.
Not even God can stop this type of mother from working. Be it official or household. These mothers need to get everything done before deadlines. They can never sit quietly in a place. They’re so restless, they’ll investigate your clean room and find something that you never even have seen and end up cleaning it just so they can do something. They’ll wash your glasses while you’re drinking out of it and refold the clothes you folded. This type of mothers will yell at you to make you do it but yell at you if you plan on doing it because they just wanted an excuse to do your work too!
The Food factory
This type of mothers are everyone’s favourite, well, in the beginning. They’ll turn the world upside down just to make sure you’re well-fed. Airports have never seen you buy food because your mother sends you off with a five-course meal. Guests love them until they make them so full that they genuinely have no space for “one more roti” that your mother anyway forces them to eat. Your friends call you lucky for having her but only you know the struggle. The only way for you to get into shape is to work out and good luck if you’re lazy because no matter what size you are, your mother will always “aren’t you getting enough food to eat, you’ve thin down to a stick” zone you. She’ll drive you crazy by asking you if you’re hungry which is again a formality because there is no “No” to that question.